Zombies
These are the zombies that EVERYONE imagines when given the word 'zombie'. There are a relatively few well-known zombie types, and a lot of new ones that deviate from the standard Zombie mold. 1. Necromantic Zombies 2. Viral Zombies 3. Sparkly Zombies 4. Parasitic Zombies Most have common features, such as decaying or fragile flesh, even if recently turned, the ability to create more zombies, and both sides can have completely random new traits, such as bright red or glowing eyes for no reason other than the fact that it looks rather cool. This makes more sense with the Necromantic Zombies, brought to life through magic and similar means than the Viral Zombies. It can be noted that the most recent breed of Zombie, the Sparkly Zombies, considers itself a vampire. However, they have many traits which are different from standard vampires, in that they SPARKLE RANDOMLY WHEN IN SUNLIGHT. This is quite possibly the only claim these kinds of zombie have to the vampiric title, and, to be brutally honest, they do not actually require human blood at all to survive- indeed, they require very little, being able to sate themselves with even something as small as a tiny smudge of blood from an insect. It is this reason why there are a greater number of non-hostile 'vampires' in the world right now, however it can be noted that their initial traits once being turned are similar to that of any fresh zombie: 1. Rage towards all things in existence: This can lead to a brutal attack on things, such as walls, people, pedestrians, and even labradors, which is really a shame since they're so k-yute! I mean, why labradors, when they could go after poodles, the pretentious canines that they are. 2. Increased strength: commonly, newly turned or created zombies have more strength than they'll have ever. This implies a great deal of decay common to all zombies, however some are capable of keeping their bodies in an effective stasis. 3. Lack of logical thought 4. If your name is Bella Cullen, bugger all. Seriously, you won't even be affected. You'll get a bit of extra strength and your life will get even more stupid, but otherwise you'll still be the translucent skinned painfully normal person that no-one really likes. And dead people don't count, despite what they say. It can be noted that with ,most kinds of zombie, decapitation works best, however some simply will NOT die, despite the wishes of the citizens that come in contact with them. Known Weapons that can be used against Zombies: 1. Shotgun The Shotgun has a long history of Zombie dispersal. However, it is fairly useless unless fired directly at the head, preferably at the nose. That way, there will be many pieces of Zombie, incapable of moving. 2. Sword type Now, the sword is a very elegant weapon, and in the hands of a trained swordsman, it can be an excellent weapon. However, for the average survivor, it should be noted that you should SLICE necks like its 1999. 3. Grenade. Messy. Also, usually in limited supply, but it works insofar that it obliterates a great deal of zombie cells. 4. Flamethrower. Only to be used if a fuel source is available. Otherwise, you WILL run out very quickly, and the slightly charred remains that attack you won't be very pleased. Effective where you can get the fuel, useless once it runs out. 5. Porn Some zombies have been known to possess the mental capacity to be capable of comprehending desires of the flesh. However, many of them have lost the necessary tools for the tasks required, not to mention the lust for devouring human flesh in a not-so-savoury way, means that when presented with pornographic material, a lot of mentally-capable zombies break down, even crying if they still have fluid in their tear ducts. A zombie has even been spotted commiting suicide after seeing the Snow White edition of Playboy, which, to be fair, was very badly done, in comparison with what one can get on the internet. 6. Alice I don't care who she is, if her name is Alice, she'll have the power to beat them all. Even if she's just the nice little indian girl next door, the Alices of the world ROCK when killing zombies. Known utterances by zombies 1. "BRAIIIINNNSSSS" I wish to devour your flesh. Please. I am doing this to survive. Please comply or I will take it by force. 2. "UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH..." I really do not wish to hurt you, and unfortunately I cannot speak the way I did when I was human. However, if you do not kill me, I will take you to the source of all this mess and show you how to prevent others from being zombiefied like myself. 3. "GRAH?" Oh bugger. I am going to die and stay dead. 4. "I don't want to hurt you" I actually want to drink all of your blood, even your periodical blood, however I cannot, since I am bound by a narrative force far greater than my own desires. Listen to my words, littel girl. I do not sparkle ON PURPOSE. 5. "RAH RAH RAH, RAH, rararara, RAH RAH RAH, RAH RA RAAAA RA RA RA RA RA RA RA!" to the sound of one of the star wars musics, the one at the end of the movies, usually. I am a fanboy turned into a zombie, Oh the IRONY!. Please, find a cure, and then we can work to a brighter future, possibly without Ashoka in our pasts...